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My name is Michael and since meeting my wife LeeAnn in 2006, I have become a man that wears many hats. Husband, Father, Grandfather, Professional Counselor, science fiction geek, movie enthusiast, Kansas City Chiefs fan and above all else, a grateful believer in Jesus Christ.  These are my musings and thoughts. In these articles, you will find, I am just an ordinary guy that continues to try and figure things out. Welcome and thanks for reading.

Taking a break, but first this... by Michael French

4/19/2015

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Hello and welcome to a very short post.  Class is winding down and finals and final projects need to be studied and completed.  I'll be back in late May with some new writing.  A preview of some articles I'm thinking about including one on forgiveness and a little fun with some thoughts on some very geeky movies.  


An update on the job prospect I was looking into.  Applications have been turned in.  Funny thing but when you forget to put a stamp on the envelope, hey it comes right back to you.  That's what happened to me.  A senior moment later and a stamp was put on it and off it went again.  Hoping to hear something this week. 


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"Chewie...we're home."
If you have been living under a rock or a deep well for the last week, then you missed out on seeing what many are saying is the greatest movie trailer ever produced.  I'm a huge Star Wars fan and I felt giddy that for a moment, I was a 10 year old experiencing Star Wars for the very first time.  When that famous space pirate and his furry sidekick showed up at the end of the preview, wow.  I had heard some men crying that are my age.  I didn't go that far.  But I understand it.  It's the same emotion that brought men to tears when they watched the end of Toy Story 3.  I cried when I saw that movie.  It was reminding us of our childhood and the innocence that so many of had as children. The world has changed since then.  It's a colder world and to see the suffering and pain that so many people have gone through and are enduring, one wonders sometimes if things can get better.  Watching the Star Wars trailer reminds us that there is good and there is evil in the world.  As the Rebel Alliance never gave up the fight against the Evil Galactic Empire,  we must not give up the fight against injustice and overcoming the pain and hardship the world has thrown at us.  I am reminded of the scripture that says that our enemy is not flesh and blood.  Paul wrote in Ephesians 6: 12-13 "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm."


This says a lot.  Often times, we war with the very ones we profess to love, our family.  There is a deeper evil at work that one day will be vanquished.  Scripture makes it clear, God wins.  Until then the final act in this cosmic drama has been ended, we must know when to resist and fight and when to flee and run.  


Ok...more later.  Have a great next couple of weeks, May The Force Be With You and may God help you through your troubles and trials.  Keep fighting the good fight. 

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A Looming Inadequacy...by Michael French 

4/4/2015

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Hi and welcome to my latest post on DadsUnite.  First off, I hope everyone has a very Happy Resurrection Sunday or as most everyone else refers to, Happy Easter.  I'm sure most of you recognize the picture to the left as a scene from Cecil B. DeMille's masterpiece, The Ten Commandments.  One of my all time favorite movies.  


This picture describes how I have been feeling.  Moses encountering God in the form of the bush.  No, I'm not some guy heading off to deliver a nation.  But remember what Moses felt like?  When God told him to go back to Egypt and tell the Pharaoh to "Let My People Go!"   I don't think Moses responded with a favorable reply.  Rather, he was pretty certain that God had screwed up and was sending the wrong man.  He began to list every excuse he could think of to have God change His mind.  Why?  Look at the title and I think you'll get where this blog is heading.  Moses felt inadequate to fulfill the task at hand.   I have been feeling that lately.  


Recently, I became aware of a possible job opportunity.  It's actually something that would go right along with what I'm studying in school.  The job is at an alternative school for High School students who have strayed off the path and gotten into drugs and other at risk behaviors.  Most of the students are seniors and seeking to graduate.  I asked about the demographics of the school. Over 90 percent are African American.  Most are at or below the poverty line and of the 25 or so kids enrolled, only a few have a dad that's active in their life.  I talked with one of the directors about it and after he left, I began to feel like God was starting to open a new door for me.  Outside of the fact, that I haven't been officially interviewed, the one big thing that stood in the way of embracing this new possibility?  Me.  Like Moses, I began to make a list of reasons why I'm not the man for the job even thought I felt drawn to it.  How can a white dude like me make a difference in the life of a young African American.  The thing is I know that on my own, I can't.  

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I feel like that kid trying to hold the boulder back.  This opportunity is like nothing I've done and I worry what if I fail?  The director had given me his email to send my resume and I put it off for a week.  At the church, I told one of our pastors about it.  I go to a multicultural church, our pastor is African American.  He was thrilled when I shared with him what I knew.  He said he could see me making a big difference there.  So was God trying to tell me something?  In his message last week, our pastor actually called my name out during his message.   That was a first.  He didn't share any details but perhaps it was just another way God was reminding me to trust Him.  Lean on Him and wait on Him.  In the back of my mind, I felt this growing presence that I should at least investigate it and ask some questions.  But I hesitated.  


In my family, there is some past history of struggling with prejudice and bigotry.  Recently, I found out a great Uncle was a member of the Ku Klux Klan back in the 1920's and 30's.  In school, I had to come face to face with my own prejudice.  I struggled with certain stereotypes.  It's something I still have to process and work on.  That usually means, taking me out of my comfort zone, something my wife and God seem to enjoy doing quite often!.   Even as we began fostering kids, I found myself fearful of getting a child of a different skin color than me.  I'm not proud of this thinking and it's something that everyday, God is helping me move past.  If I hadn't let go and let God begin to change me, I never would have met Jeanetta and she changed my life.   After taking a break, we are about to start fostering again and I wonder who we will be parents to and will they fit the stereotype that I struggle with?  Will I embrace them and accept them or will I feel inadequate because of these lingering feelings of prejudice.   One more time to let go and let God.   The stereotype of a person is just on the outside.  I see it all the time with the high school boys that use our gym.  The attitude and the saggy pants. The rugged exterior some might portray merely covers up their own nervousness and uncertainties.   But if you could break down that wall, you would find young men and women that just want to feel accepted, loved and that what they say matters.  Isn't that how most of us want others to see us?   


Looming Inadequacy, I feel it a lot.

I really do feel inadequate most of the time.   But each time I do, God has this amazing yet gentle way of helping me to to see that it's ok.  Anytime we step out into something that we have no experience in or afraid to do what seems to be the impossible.  Its natural that we might feel some hesitancy and fear .  Those of you that know me.  Could you have seen me as a foster dad, a blog writer, a student and yes even a husband?  Frankly, a few years back, I couldn't let alone even fathom what I'm doing now.  I didn't have the confidence and self belief in myself to do those things.  I think when we make excuses and struggle to see beyond what is to what can be and we strive to yield to Him and are willing participants, then hang on, God is ready to help us do those things that are way beyond our own ability.  


I call them God sized tasks and frankly they are.  With this new possibility at this school, God has reminded me that I felt exactly the same way when my wife brought up the topic of being foster parents.  I was terrified and afraid I would fail or somehow, despite my best intentions, screw up the system.  When I went back to school after a 23 year absence, I was afraid I'd be the same average student I was when I was up at Northwest.  I did just enough to get by.  Well today, because of God's grace and a little bit of effort, I'm pulling A's and B's.  I hope to graduate next spring with honors. This week, I submitted my application to the school and am hopeful that if God has opened the door, that I will walk through it with a humbled confidence.  I have as much to learn as the kids I hope to mentor.   Stormie Omartian is a Christian author and speaker.  A friend of mine posted this quote of hers on Facebook.  I saw it while I was writing this today.  Certainly appropriate to my situation.  Maybe it is to whatever task you might be feeling inadequate in. 


"Don’t worry if you have doubts about whether you can accomplish what God has called you to do. God always calls us to something greater than ourselves—something bigger than we can accomplish on our own. That’s because He wants us to rely on Him.
It’s when you’re convinced that you can’t do it on your own that God says, “I can use you now. You’re ready to move into what I have for you.”


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A very simple statement and full of truth.   Here are some wonderful verses from scripture that speak this truth.  
2 Corinthians 12: 10  "For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong."


Isiah 41:10  "Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."


Phillipians 4:13  "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."


It's when we are totally dependent on God that He can work wonders.  We have to let Him...He isn't going to force His way in.  He gives us that choice.  In my case, when I yield and submit to His authority and let Him work.  I just become willing and then get out of the way.  He has done amazing things in me.  I am more confident than I was a few years ago.  Everything that has happened in the last few years serves as a reminder that when I hear those negative thoughts and self defeated talk, I go back and remember just how far I come.  So whether it's fostering, or mentoring or maybe doing what seems to be the impossible...The Lord has this covered!  What is your story?  If you are feeling inadequate, how do you get past that?  As always, feel free to respond and be an encouragement to others or be encouraged!   I hope each of you, however you celebrate have a fantastic Easter.  He is Risen!

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    This blog is my attempt to offer my perspective on the various avenues of my life. In 2014, my then 17 year old foster daughter entered me into the National Center for Fathering, Kansas City Father of the Year contest.  She had submitted an essay to the contest question "What my father or father-figure means to me?" Her winning entry nominated me for the contest.  Out of almost a thousand entries, I landed in the top 5.  That event changed my life and cemented the bond I have with my now adopted daughter.  I didn't want the contest to be just an event with little lasting impact on my family and I.  This blog I created is my attempt to inspire, motivate and just share with other men that they to can elevate who they are as in every avenue of their life.  I welcome comments in the comment section found at the end of each article.  Feel free to email me at Michael.French62008@gmail.com. 

    Created by Michael French
    September 2014

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